Dating

There’s nothing worse then when someone is desperate to get into a relationship or even just have a date. I know a couple of these people and the one thing it is, is not attractive. Love usually happens when you’re so wrapped up in your single life and it hits you in the face.

Look at it this way. You’re on the subway and you’re waiting for the train. A really good looking, handsome stranger starts chatting with you. Hmm this could be promising. All of a sudden he starts telling you how he’s a banker on Wall Street and you know what his salary is. Okay maybe it’s a fluke and he’s nervous and babbling.

Then he goes on to describe how he was the star of the high school football team, how he got a 4.0 in college and how he lives in an apartment in Manhattan. *Yawn* What do I mean by “yawn”? The guy obviously has some major insecurity issues. No I haven’t lost my mind, I’m serious. This guy is shying away from what you should be learning about the most- his personality. He’s so busy bragging about his possessions and achievements that he’s making it seem like he has nothing else to offer in terms of who he actually is inside. He’s reeking of desperation.

He’s desperate for you to like him, so he’s trying to get your attention by throwing all of these non-relevant facts in your face. Now granted, these material things may completely grab the attention of some women, but the majority of women are going to consider this desperation and a turn off. Yes, it’s good to know that he’s not living in a box and that his parents aren’t giving him an allowance but there’s a difference between making yourself shine and putting an invisible sign on you that says “Please date me, give me something. Anything.” The next thing you know he’s handing you his business card and telling you to give him a call. You take the card, put it in your purse and he follows up with “You’re going to call me right?”

When you are single and you get a phone number, there is no reason to keep asking them to go on a date or hang out repeatedly. If you ask someone to go out and they say that they’re busy, wait another week to ask again. If they again, say that they’re busy then let it go. There’s only so many times that you can ask. When they’re free, then they’ll ask you. It’s different if this is a friend, but this is just someone you’re beginning to get acquainted with. There’s a difference between letting them know that you’re interested and basically begging for them to be in your presence.

Be proud of who you are and what you do. Yes, you may get overwhelmed but keep the desperation under control. Keep telling yourself “If this person wants to get to know me, they’ll make the effort as well. I’m proud of my accomplishments, but they’ll come up over time in conversation. I’ll stretch out my good qualities and things I’m proud of over time, instead of throwing it out there right off the bat.”

You have a choice. You can either come off completely desperate and lose something before you even get it, or you can have a chance at something great.

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