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Jul 30 2008

Don’t Forget Your Friends

Did you ever have a friend that as soon as they found a boyfriend or girlfriend, they suddenly started to vanish? The calls became less frequent and they hung out with you less and less. Probably. You may even be one of those people. Now granted, it may be that you see this friend less because suddenly you have another person that you share your life with where you have a second set of family obligations to deal with along with alone time that you would like with this other person, but most people don’t let it affect their friendships to a severe point.

What if this friend flat out told you that they couldn’t go out anymore because they had a boyfriend? It happened to me and yes, I was extremely hurt. This person flat out told me that because they had a boyfriend they could no longer get lunch, go for a walk or to get some coffee. This person stated that they had a future to plan with this person that they were dating. However, I was told that I could occasionally stop over the house if I wanted to. I was also told that things are different then from the person that I am dating because she hasn’t been dating this guy that long (they’ve been dating for two years). Not relatively new in my opinion. Apparently this message has also been relayed to her other friends who see no problem with her saying that she is not going to be going out anymore and sees no problem with the fact that she doesn’t ever pick up the phone when she’s in his presence.

As much as I care for this friend, it’s simply not worth my time and my hurt has turned to an “I don’t care attitude.” I find no point in doing everything I can for a friendship that has a cloud looming over it. I’m definitely not the only person to have gone through this situation and I’m sure as hell not going to be last and frankly, it’s disappointing that some people don’t realize how precious a good friend can truly be.

Friends are important and it doesn’t matter if you are single, dating or you’re married. Friends are who you can turn to when you’re having problems and when you need a hug or a simple night out away from everything. Being friends with someone doesn’t mean picking up and dropping the person because you found someone to date. Your friends should be just as big a part of your future as the person that you can see yourself spending the rest of your life with.

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7 Responses to “Don’t Forget Your Friends”

  1. blondiewriteson 30 Jul 2008 at 7:54 pm edit this

    Unfortunately it is not just friends that do this, it can happen to family members such as parents who find new love interests. I thought my dad was the only one that did this after my mom passed, but my best friends daughter’s mother-in-law met a man who she is in love with since being widowed for almost two years and she has no time for the family anymore.

    It is strange. I need my friends or this man would drive me nuts. LOL

  2. violettebon 31 Jul 2008 at 1:20 am edit this

    I have one that I grew apart from after she got married. Her husband seemed to be controlling and it was like we could never get together because of him. And I was living in another state so it didn’t make sense as I wasn’t monopolizing her time on a daily basis. I was only visiting a few times a year and lived 5 hours away. I still love her and know in our hearts we are friends and hope someday we touch base again.

  3. pinkinkon 31 Jul 2008 at 3:57 am edit this

    It drives me crazy when people do this!! I have had several friends who got engaged or married and I never hear from them again without warning. It makes me very sad.

    Friends are truly gems. When you get a true friend you can count on through thick and thin, it is wise to hold onto that person because he or she will be there for you no matter what happens.

    I really wish more people would remember the importance of friendships, whether they are single, dating, engaged, or married. Spending time with good friends is so important.

    Sierra
    http://anxiety.today.com

  4. chrison 31 Jul 2008 at 9:36 am edit this

    The person that did this to you does not know the meaning of the word friend and in all honesty, you are better off without them.

  5. brandbla8on 31 Jul 2008 at 11:48 am edit this

    Friends are forever but boyfriends may come and go. I live by that and over the years I have wound up with only 3 friends that are still around today. Now family is the same way as well. i only see 1 of my aunts on a regular basis. We all used to be so tight and it is sad to me.
    http://usfreeworkfromhome.today.com

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