Dating

Casually dating isn’t so complicated, that is, until you realize that you want to take it to the next level and be exclusive with the person you’re interested in. Granted, it doesn’t have to be complicated, but sometimes it is. So how do you take your casual dating relationship to exclusive?

It’s quite simple, you have to ask. Yes it’s scary, but it’s so much better knowing where both you and the other person stand as opposed to being clueless and trying to analyze every little thing that they do for some type of answer.

Here are the situations that could happen. S/he could either say that they have feelings for you as well and want to be exclusive, they don’t want to be exclusive and want to continue casually dating, or they’ll break everything off entirely. Being faced with these three options leads people to back off from bringing up the topic of exclusivity in the first place.

Let’s break down these situations.

If s/he wants to be exclusive, great, you got what you want and you can see where it goes from there.

They don’t want to be exclusive but want to continue casually dating you. Here’s the problem with this scenario. You could still go out and casually date other people, but while you’re also still casually dating this person, you’re heart is going to have some form of attachment and therefore you are less likely to be able to give your heart to someone else. They may not ever be able (or want) to be exclusive with you. You’re better off breaking it off all together so you can completely move on. Why would you sit there and waste your time with someone who doesn’t want what you want? This leads me to the third scenario.

S/he breaks off everything entirely after you bring up being exclusive. This is probably what scares a person the most out of the three options. Here’s the thing. If a guy or girl is given the option to be with someone that they have feelings for, chances are they’re going to jump at the chance. If the person has feelings and doesn’t take the opportunity, well then they have an issue that you can’t fix and they’re going to have to work through it themself.

If you let the person go and they don’t come back to you willing to work on things, then they’re not worth your time and you’re better off finding someone else. If they do come back, then they realized what they had, what they lost, and what they don’t want to live without.

I know from personal experience how much it hurts to be in a situation like this and how frustrating it can be. However, I also know that it does, in all honesty, work out for the best.

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